“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

A while back, I shared my adventure with JC Penney.  For those, including myself, who may not remember, let me recap.

Earlier this year, a statement came in the mail for my JC Penney charge card.  There was a figure on it: $700!  Well, I hadn’t spent $700 over the past month, so I called them up and while wading through the automated system, I noticed that no payments were due.  Upon further investigation, I realized it was a CREDIT of $700.  When I finally talked with a real person, they said that someone else’s payment must have accidentally been placed into my account and not to worry, they’d take care of it.

The following month, the credit remained….and shortly after the statement arrived, there was a refund check in the mail from JC Penney for $700.  Once again, I got on the phone, made my way through the Godless automated system until I reached a human being and re-explained the situation.  He said words to the effect of ,  “Oh, it’s a good thing you didn’t cash that check because we’re on to the mistake and that check would be no good.”   I was relieved the whole thing was finally over.

Oh, don’t get me wrong.  Who wouldn’t love an extra $700 dropped in your lap?  Tax-free, just lost in the corporate ozone.  But sadly, I absorbed some of the morals and ethics that surrounded me while growing up, so I felt the honest thing to do was to report it.  After all, some poor schtoop paid $700 towards their bill and you would think they’d be pretty upset by now that it hadn’t been credited to their account.  And all the interest charges, etc.

Then, a week ago, another statement came.  I still had a balance of $700.  Adding insult to injury, yet another $700 check came in the mail.  At this point, I’m toying with the idea of cashing it…just sitting on the money until one day, someone at Penney’s goes through the books and says, “Hey, we gave money to some Bozo in Seattle!!”

However, we might as well have some fun first.  So, I sent a note to KING 5’s Jesse Jones about my dilemma.  He helps lots of people with real problems, but I thought he might have fun righting this great wrong.  Imagine, taking on a major American corporation who keeps harassing someone by trying to give them $700.  Gosh, I hope there’s a happy ending.

Sit down, John Travolta.  I’m talking about Penney’s finally taking back their money.  All I want from them is a zero balance.  Can it really be that hard?

Wish me luck.  I’ll keep you posted.

Tim Hunter